Beginner’s Guide to Lube Shopping: The 5 types and what they’re best for (and what to avoid)

sexual lubricant guide

Every type of lube, what they're suitable for, what they're not good for, and how to choose one!

When it comes to sex of any kind, wetter is better. However, choosing the perfect lubricant is difficult. There is so much variety available. How can you decide which lubricant is best for you? 

There are five main types of lubricants. Water-based lubricants, Silicone-based lubricants, hybrid lubricants, naturally-based lubricants, and oil-based lubricants. To choose just one, you need to know (1) is it condom compatible? (2) is it suitable for your skin type? (3) does it meet your sexual needs?

At Sex with Elaine, we always suggest starting at an affordable price point. Then moving up from there to luxury items. It'll be trial by fire. Without knowing exactly what you want from a lubricant, you could be wasting money.

Today, we'll break down each kind of lubricant, the pros, the cons, and who it is ideal for.


All products recommended are personally selected by me, Elaine S. Turner. I choose them and genuinely believe in them. However, this article may contain affiliate links. That means if you use that link to buy a product, I may earn a small affiliate commission, or tip, as I like to see it. You can learn more here if you have any questions about my affiliate policy.


What is a sexual lubricant?

Sexual lubricants are specially formulated gels or liquids used to reduce friction during sex. 

They can be added to your hand, your penis, your vagina, your sex toy, anything you use for pleasure! 

Let's dispel some lube myths:


Myth: If you need lube, you're not a good lover

sexual lubricant guide

Fact: Wetter is better. If you have a vagina, you produce your own lubrication.

However, it certainly isn't enough for extended sex sessions.

Adding lubrication can make vaginal sex more pleasurable and help you last longer since it reduces friction.

Your anus does not make lube.

Therefore, you 1000% need it for anal sex.


Myth: People use lube when something is wrong

Fact: Lube is used to improve the quality of sex, not to "fix" anything.

Especially if sex lasts longer than a few minutes, lubricant makes it much more pleasurable.

Also, experimenting with different types of lube can spice things up!

At Sex with Elaine, I like to think of it as pairing a meal with a glass of wine. 


Myth: All lubricants are the same

sexual lubricant guide

Fact: This couldn't be further from the truth.

Many companies will churn out dozens of variations with very little attention to what they're adding to it.

Other companies, such as Pjur, spend millions of dollars on scientific research to make high-quality lubes.


Myth: Coconut and olive oil are great for sex.

Fact: While they can work, we strongly suggest you don't use anything that isn't specifically formulated for your genitals.

Both olive oil and coconut oil fall under the "oil-based" section.

They break condoms, clog pores, and disrupt pH levels. 


Myth: The condom comes with lube already, so we don't need more.

Fact: Putting a few drops of lubricant on the inside of the condom will make sex more pleasurable.

Also, using lubricants can prevent condoms from breaking!

One of the top reasons why condoms break is from friction, aka a lack of lubrication. 


Myth: If the lube feels good, keep adding more

Fact: There is such a thing as too much lube.

If you put on too much, grab a towel or tissue and wipe it away.

You and your partner(s) may find your bodies become sticky and that it dulls the intensity of sexual sensation.


Myth: Any lubricant is fine for conception

Fact: Most lubricants will drastically impact your pH levels.

Making it more difficult for sperm to survive the journey.

If you're looking to conceive and want a lubricant option, check out the brand Good, Clean Love.


Water-based lubricants

You can grab a water-based lubricant while you're checking out at a gas station or the grocery store. They're affordable, don't stain sheets, and come in a wide variety of sensations.

Since they're affordable, you should be asking why they have such a low price point.

You may assume that it's because they're made primarily with water.

Sure, that contributes.

But the truth is that many companies shove tons of preservatives into their water-based lubricants.

They do this so they're shelf-stable for a long time. But that means that they are not suitable for your body, especially if you have a vulva. 

Certain preservatives such as glycerine (usually one of the top ingredients in any water-based lubricant) will disrupt the delicate pH balance in your vagina. This disruption can lead to yeast infections, an increased risk of STIs, and unusual discharge.

sexual lubricant guide

When you're choosing a water-based lubricant, avoid these ingredients:

  • Glycerine

  • Propylene glycol

  • Nonoxynol-9 (spermicide)

  • Artificial sweeteners

    Pros of water-based lubricants:

    • They're affordable.

    • Tons of sensations, flavours, and textures to choose between.

    • Usually, it won't stain your sheets.

    • You can use it with any sex toy or activity.

    • It can be quickly rehydrated when it dries out by spraying a little water on it.

    • Easy to wash off skin or out of sheets.

    Cons of water-based lubricants:

    • Usually, the first or second ingredient in affordable water-based lubes is glycerine, so it is hard to avoid without spending more money.

    • Many lubricants contain chemicals and preservatives.

    • They're easily absorbed by the body and dry out quickly.

    • Not ideal for anal sex since they dry out fast.


Silicone-based lubricants

Silicone-based lubes are the more expensive cousin of water-based lubricants.

They last much longer than a water-based lubricant and are great for anal sex or water sex.

Since their base is silicone, You shouldn't use them with silicone-containing sex toys

They're great for vaginal dryness, those who are menopausal, extended sex sessions, and all play

Typically, they're hypoallergenic, so ideal for people with allergies or sensitive skin.

The downside here is that they'll stain your sheets, and they're hard to wash off. Pretty minor caveats if you ask me. 

Pros of silicone-based lubricants:

sexual lubricant guide
  • Perfect for anal sex or water sex.

  • Great for those with sensitive skin or allergies.

  • Excellent for all over body massages as it leaves skin feeling silky smooth.

  • It lasts much longer than water-based lubes.

Cons of silicone-based lubricants

  • It stains things easily, such as towels, sheets, and clothing.

  • You cannot use it with toys that also contain silicone.

  • Difficult to wash off of hands or genitals.


Hybrid lubricants

Usually, these are a blend of water and silicone lubricants. Typically about 10% silicone and 90% water. They bring together the best of both worlds.

They're more likely to be toy compatible and are still great for anal play. Hybrids are generally pretty expensive and a bit more challenging to track down. 

The pros of hybrid lubricants

sexual lubricant guide
  • Lasts much longer than strictly water-based lubricants.

  • Many are compatible with silicone-based toys.

  • It has similar skin benefits as silicone-based lubricants.

  • Easier to clean up than silicone-based lubricants.

  • Still great for anal play or water play.

The cons of hybrid lubricants

  • It still frequently stains sheets and other fabrics.

  • Not all toys are compatible with it.

  • The small percentage of silicone means that it won't last as long as a full silicone-based lubricant.

  • Fewer varieties and more challenging to find.


Natural lubricants

sexual lubricant guide

No, we don't mean to grab an aloe plant from your backyard. These are lubricants that are formulated using only natural ingredients. They're usually vegan, cruelty-free, and organic. 

They're especially great for people with a sensitive pH balance or whose skin is easily irritated.

Since they're relatively new to the sex world, you may be hard-pressed to find a decent variety.

The pros of naturally-based lubricants

  • Ideal for those with a sensitive pH balance.

  • Less likely to cause skin irritation since it lacks preservatives or harmful additives.

  • Most are organic, vegan, and cruelty-free

  • Almost all of them are condom and toy compatible.

  • Some contain probiotics that can help balance the vulva's pH level.

The cons of naturally-based lubricants

  • They're usually very expensive when compared to other lubricants

  • They can be challenging to find.

  • They tend to dry out quickly, especially those which contain aloe vera.


Oil-based lubricants

sexual lubricant guide

If you walk into most sex shops, you'll probably see a tub of Crisco or something similar sitting on the shelf.

This phenomenon is because oil-based lubricants have been a popular choice for decades based on their low price-point and availability.

There is a massive variety out there, many of which you can pick up when you're doing your grocery shopping.

However, we've learned many things about these lubricants that make me strongly discourage their usage.

The pros of oil-based lubricants

  • The longest-lasting of any lube variety.

  • Great for unprotected anal sex.

  • You can find it in your kitchen cupboard.

The cons of oil-based lubricants

  • THEY ARE NOT LATEX CONDOM COMPATIBLE. The condom will likely break or at least have microtears.

  • It clogs pores meaning you may develop an adverse skin reaction from use.

  • They will stain your sheets.

  • They're not specifically designed with your genitals in mind, meaning they're likely to cause a host of problems.

As I said before, variety is the spice of life!

Having a few bottles of each type of lubricant will ensure that you will always have exactly what you want on hand.

Take time and consider the pros and cons of each before investing in your new lubricant, and maybe, steer clear of the ones you can purchase at the gas station. 



“Wetter is always better.”

— Unknown


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